The annual meeting in San Juan was "hot", not only thermally but also in terms of the great variety and high quality of rumors that abounded there. Of course most RRSers (Real Radiation Scientists) were not even aware of this shadowy undercurrent of rumor mongering that washed over the meeting, much like the waves that pounded the beach at the hotel right outside the meeting. But not to worry, because this reporter is charged with ferreting out the best rumors and providing them to you in this column. For example, it was rumored that there would be a surprise presentation of a "best dressed attendee" award at the Business Meeting. Several of my most irreputable and highly unreliable sources informed me that the top two candidates for the award were Liz Travis and Kathy Mason. However in a sudden move as stunning in its secrecy as in its boldness, the anonymous ad hoc committee charged with making the selection allegedly awarded the prize to an unknown attendee. The committee was purportedly thwarted in its attempt to make the award at the business meeting when the hotel security force would not allow the winner to be escorted into the ballroom where the meeting was being held. Oh well, there’s always next year in Reno.

Each year this reporter attends the RRS meeting proudly wearing my "RRS Rumor Reporter" credential and trying to listen in on as many conversations as possible as well as holding clandestine meetings with my informants. However this year was different in one respect: Bill Osborne noticed me and used his new digital camera to take my picture. So, thanks to Bill, here I am at work in San Juan:

Parties made up a major fraction of the activities in San Juan, at least for some RRS members. The annual Dewey-Corry-Spitz party generated a number of juicy rumors (as usual), only the juiciest of which can be reported here. For example, one of the party-goers supposedly told one of my informants that he overheard a very inebriated male RRSer telling an equally inebriated colleague "Hell, if we got irradiated now our LD50s would be double the normal amount! Let’s have a double to celebrate!" All this revelry did not go unnoticed by other hotel clientele. It is rumored that the hotel security force was told that there was a noisy "radiation party" going on upstairs. They supposedly entered the party suite in full anti-C clothing and with Geiger counters clicking, they ordered the partygoers out to the courtyard. Rumor has it that they didn’t confiscate the liquor because they heard that it, too, was radioactive and needed to be consumed by the "crazy radiation scientists". Maybe the NRC will investigate? The Canadians, who had scheduled their party for the next night, were reportedly concerned that they would also be branded as "crazy Canadian radiation scientists" and were supposedly informed that their party might actually be removed to the nearby island of Vieques where the US Navy was conducting bombing exercises. My usually unreliable sources tell me that the Canadians quickly changed the entrance requirements for their party. Instead of requiring each person who wanted to enter the party to spell "Canada" as they had planned, they decided that each person would have to answer the question "Are you a crazy Canadian?" As a result the party had fewer attendees and was a nice, quiet affair. Credit the Canadian party planners for quick thinking in the face of adversity!

The science being discussed at the meeting contained frequent references to something called "the bystander effect". It was rumored that one of the presenters at the meeting referred to their microbeam experiments on this subject as "drive-by shootings". As you might expect from the crowd of RRSers, no one laughed at this.

Another fascinating rumor has to do with the leadership of the long-standing "Late Effects Group". It is alleged that Dennis Leeper is being considered as a candidate for its new coordinator position, not for the Effects part, but because he would be able to bring in investigators working on late damage, delayed plating, and unscheduled synthesis.

The Young Investigator’s Luncheon was again very successful and well attended, in spite of Kathy Mason’s warning that "there is no such thing as a free lunch" (TINSTAAFL). However, it is rumored that some of the attendees became skeptical about this slogan when they found out that Bob Sutherland, whose firm had helped support the luncheon, was assigned two different seats and two meals at the luncheon.